About Clare Austen-Smith
Hi! I'm Clare. I am a writer, illustrator, and comedian based in Chicago. You can find me lurking in a green room near you or eating pad thai at a coffee shop without a fork because I was scared of getting kicked out for bringing in "outside food."
I have written for Bustle, Thought Catalog, and Sweet Lemon Media.
I create sketch comedy videos under the name Young Professional Women as well as with the iO Comedy Network.
Interested in commissions or bookings? Contact me below.
Follow me on Twitter at @ClareAusten and on Instagram as @OkayClare
I only refer to my breasts as "giant taste pillows"
The white people mad about "chickpea dessert creme" liked George bush jr when he started painting shitty dogs
Mariah Carey has 100% uttered the phrase "I must be the hottest person at my funeral"
I got a new headshots and now everyone believes I am a human woman not 10,000 and 1 snakes